2020 is not what we expected. We are reflecting on the 20 for 2020 goals we set at the beginning of the year – deciding what’s important to us for the rest of the year and letting go of the rest.
This is our first new episode after our season break, and we’re happy to be back! In today’s episode, we are reimagining the 20 for 2020 goals we set at the beginning of the year. We talk about our goals in Episode 29, which seems like so long ago.
2020 is not what any of us signed up for, and most of the grand plans we had back in January went out the window. The past few months have been unlike anything we’ve seen in our lifetimes: the global pandemic and its repercussions, the long-overdue reckoning with racial injustice, and the mental load and uncertainty about the future that comes along with all of it.
Now, as we’re beginning to shift into the school year, which is kind of like a second new year for educators and parents, it seemed like a good time to take a step back and evaluate this year’s goals. Our brains are in survival mode and are overloaded with inputs, so it’s a good time to be intentional about what is important to us and figure out where we want to allocate our time and energy.
Important caveat: if you don’t have the bandwidth to be thinking about personal development or goal setting right now, that is understandable! This is not a time we can expect ourselves to be super productive. No guilt or shame if you are just trying to survive right now and want to pause this episode and pick it up when you have more bandwidth.
For us, it’s been helpful in this stressful time to be intentional about how we’re spending our time – and what we can control in our little sliver of the world – but this is by no means what we think anyone else “should” be expected to do. We’re going to be realistic about what’s important to us for the rest of the year and let go of the rest, remembering that we are the bosses of our lists and the whole point is to make us happier and more fulfilled.
We check in on our original categories and intentions for our 20 for 2020 goals and how we want to refocus or reimagine them for the remainder of the year. We let go of a lot of things, but we were also surprised by some that we have kept up or added the last few months.
Tips for Reimagining Your Goals
Here are a few tips as you’re revisiting and reimagining your goals for the year. A few we talked about at the beginning of the year – and they still feel relevant now.
1. Let go of guilt and shoulds.
Down with the shoulds, especially now! If you get “nothing” (nothing in quotation marks) done this year except make it through, that’s enough. This is an exceptionally tough time for all of us, so if you are staying safe and well and trying to look out for others – wearing masks and social distancing, please! – that is a big deal. Be kind to yourself, and give yourself credit for what you are doing.
2. Simplify your list.
Be honest about what’s really essential to do this year and what you can handle right now and pare down your list. You may scale back to 5 goals this year or lower the bar within a goal (e.g. the number of books you want to read). Focus on what’s most important to you right now and where you can make the most impact within your current circumstances.
3. Change goals if you want.
They’re not set in stone! Tweak them, swap them for something else, or abandon them if they’re not serving you. Priorities will shift or circumstances will change, and that’s ok. It’s liberating to remember that you’re the boss of your list, and it’s just there to serve you.
4. Make your goals achievable.
Stretch goals can be inspiring, but they can also be discouraging. Try to set the bar where you can actually reach it, so you’ll feel good about the progress you’ve made and motivated to keep going. On some days, if all you manage to do is get out of bed, give yourself grace and get back to your goals when you have the energy available.
Get It Together / Got It Together
We each share something that we’d like to work on and something that’s going well for us right now.
Melia Get It Together: Not having a regular exercise habit (or getting outdoors
Melia’s Got It Together: Maintaining social connections in quarantine
Gill’s Get It Together: Falling deep down the news rabbit hole
Gill’s Got It Together: Getting into a simple summer cooking routine
Get In Touch
Have you reimagined or let go of any goals for this year? Email us at podcast[at]semitogether.com or send us a voice memo. And sign up for our e-newsletter to stay in the loop during our upcoming break from full episodes.
Resources
- The Evolving Perfectionist
- Woebot app
- Calm app
- Headspace app
- 1 Second Everyday app
- 8 Dates: Essential Conversations for a Lifetime of Love by John Gottman and Julie Schwartz Gottman